As I am sitting on my porch, watching the rain and the storm, I am completely in awe of my Father. I can not believe how much He has blessed me. A lovely house in which I can bless others by hosting them. An amazing community of girls. He is constantly putting people in my life that encourage and challenge me.
I absolutely adore nature. The work that God spoke into being. Can you believe that He decided to speak all of these amazing things into being, yet He formed us with his hands? His love for us is unhindered. It’s wild.
I like to have a firm grasp on my life. I like to fit everything into a pretty envelope, not allowing for surprises or a change of events. Yet, this isn’t reality. Things happen, expectations shattered, people leave, people come, pain suffocates us. And when things seem disorienting, I cling to my Father. It’s comforting to be able to run directly to Him and be met with open arms, completely safe. Everything that happens in my life leads me back to my Father. I have no doubt that He is the only one that holds my true, unwavering attention. Today is one of the very precious days that I am brought to my knees.
I am enjoying this weather so much. I wake up and it smells amazing! (because we have all our windows open) It reminds me of when I was younger and we would shut off the air conditioning in the spring/early summer and leave the house open. It was a freeing feeling – letting the fresh air filter in made it feel like you were outside all the time. I would explore the hills and pasture by my house. It was my favorite thing. I would map out where I walked and try to find geodes in the creek. I did succeed quite a few times! When I think of exploring, I think of God. When I think of rain, wind, lightning, thunder, and sky…I think of God. It is incredible how God uses nature to capture my heart. Ahh, I marvel at the Lord’s grace.
Yesterday morning, I made it a God morning. I was broken with disappointment, because I haven’t made God a priority lately at all. I miss Him so much, I miss time with Him and I realize why I’ve felt so dry and joyless – I haven’t been spending time with my Creator. I don’t understand how this is a problem over and over again, when I KNOW that the best thing for me is to live my life according to how my Father tells us to. Ugg my flesh. This week, I decided to focus my prayer time and my bible reading on how I spend my time. I want my life to not reflect my own wishes and desires, because I have no right to them. I want my life to be Gods, because not only will it be better, it will bring joy to the Lord and be a witness! The cry of my heart for this week is “Change. me. Please, God.” I’m in disgust of how I live my life. I read this morning “Life is far too short, and our accountability to an almighty God far too serious, not to make the most of our days.”
“Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.” Psalm 90:14
Today I have no classes, so that means I’m living in the labs working on animation projects. Here’s one of the projects I’m working on – a logo animation. Kinda lame and pretty simple, but that’s the way my skills are going so far 🙂
I’m glad it’s earth day today – free coffee all day long!
It’s been quite a while since I have posted and I miss blogging so much! Hopefully it will become more regular.
This morning I had a friend, Divya, over for breakfast. I conveniently (due to my failed alarm) woke up ten minutes before she arrived, soaking from her bike ride in the rain. We made breakfast – eggs, fruit, and a wonderful pot of coffee – and just talked. Divya is such a blessing! She definitely made my morning 🙂
Somewhere in the business of life and work and projects, I seem to have stopped doing some things that I’ve previously loved to do: run, read, play piano. I started reading again, making an attempt to tackle “Great Expectations” by Charles Dickens. I’m enjoying it so far and it’s reminded me why I loved reading so much!
Lately, I’ve been trying to stay ahead with class work and get my summer internship things situated. I’m a bit nervous and really excited about spending the summer in Minneapolis. I hope that I can explore as much as I am hoping to and find a great community to join for the summer.